The Nutcracker
Our town is a tourist destination. Like many resort or tourist destinations we often look for activities and events to boost the “shoulder” seasons. Often, it is nearly impossible to find a place to stay during the peak seasons and nearly impossible to get half occupancy in the off season. Like squirrels, Hoteliers and restaurant owners need to take the proceeds or “nuts” from the fruitful months and store them for the winter. This is where the nutcracker comes in.
12 six foot tall nutcrackers adorn the quaint downtown
streets during the holiday season. Some
communities create a holiday lighting drive through display while others
transform their downtown into a winter wonderland that could easily be mistaken
for a story book. This is our town. Santas sleigh is dusted off and prepared for
the local park. Ornamental garland is strung across the road and white lights
are strung across Main Street with a welcome message of Happy Holidays. This is in a town that can still get away
with a sign that could read “Merry Christmas”
A police report was filed for the case of the missing nutcracker. Not only was one of the 6 foot statues stolen
but it was done right in front of the police department. The only thing that was left was the
fiberglass feet that were attached to the plywood box. Apparently the culprit did not have the time
to property disconnect the Nutcracker from its properly installed position.
The job description states “Other duties as necessary” Looks like locating, ordering, transporting a
6 foot soldier would fall into that category.
In case anyone was wondering the
cost of a life-sized nutcracker is approximately 500 bucks. Then comes the shipping cost. As estimates for shipping rose close to $300
range, one of the cemetery staff mentioned this cost was close to the cost of
shipping a deceased body. So became the Google
searches. “6 foot nutcracker search” “body transport costs” to obtain a proper estimate, you of course needed
to specify whether you are in a casket, vault or bag.
As colorful as the exercise was, crating and conventional
shipping was used.
The date the case of the missing life-sized nutcracker is
still unsolved. Quite sure it has
adorned the lobby of a local fraternity or teenage bedroom.
